Dyscalculia: You Need To Know

Ever heard of the learning disability dyslexia? Of course you have. Now, how about the learning disability dyscalulia? No? I didn't think so.

Dyscalculia is a math-based learning disability where one is not just "bad at math", but is not able to do even simple math problem solving as numbers look like gobbledygook to them. Not only just math, but dyscalculia even effects things like spacial relativity, conceptualizing, memory, and an understanding of time. Dyscalculia is a relatively newly acknowledged cognitive disorder that few know about, but it is estimated to effect 4-6% of the population of the world.

The reason I am sharing this is because I was diagnosed with dyscalcuila at 18. It effected my entire life from the time I was a small child; teachers were frustrated, my parents where frustrated, and I could only sit back and think that I was a disappointment and a  failure to everyone. Growing up I was constantly told by teachers that I was lazy, a bad kid, or just plain stupid (even though I excelled at every other subject in school), all because I just couldn't do even the simplest of math problems or tell the time. This was incredibly damaging and was a huge blow to my self esteem.

When I finally learned that I'm not stupid and that I actually have a legitimate learning disorder it was a major relief to me, however, it has not necessarily made my life any easier. Sure, I was able to have my basic college math class waived, but trying to continue my education in a biology major is easier said than done. I've already had to give up dreams of becoming a veterinarian or a paleontologist (both things that I am rather good at) because the courses require too much math that no matter how hard I try at I will always fail. Getting an entry level job is also a nearly impossible task since I cannot do things like record keeping or handling money (even with a calculator the chances of me putting in the wrong number in a rushed situation are far too high). Even getting to places is difficult since my time management is poor at best (I also have a driving phobia that very well may be a result of my dyscalculia as well). Dyscalcuia even effects my art. That's right. My art. Because conceptualizing things is very hard for me I have a difficult time drawing what I see in my mind without some kind of reference. I can do it, but like I said; it is difficult. I will never be able to work an art job aside from freelancing (not that I'd want to anyway).

I'll have you know that a learning disability is not a crutch or an excuse, it is a real thing that effects people's lives. There is no cure for dyscalculia. I will have it until the day I die and I cannot change this. I cannot simply "try harder" and hope that it will go away. It. Wont. It'd be like telling a blind person that if they just "tried harder" they could see; no amount of begging, bargaining, or "trying harder" will change the fact that they are blind. A learning disability is a real cognitive disability, there is a part of the brain that is malformed and cannot be changed. My dad to this day does not believe that I have a disability and his entire side of the family follows suit. I am constantly told by him that I need to "try harder", that I'm just lazy or making up excuses. I have "tried harder", and I still try my best on a daily basis to work around my disability, but it isn't going to magically go away.

I am putting this out there so that you can be aware of this; dyscalculia is a real disability. If you know anyone who also suffers because of it the best thing you can do is stop telling them they're not good enough or that they need to "try harder". Or if you have dyscalculia too, then know that you are not stupid or alone.

Here are some articles about dyscalculia if you're interested in some further reading:
Dyscalcuila Learning Disabilities Association of America
Understanding Dyscalculia
11 Facts About the Math Disorder Dyscalculia
Heartache by the Number: My Life With Dyscalculia